peace

ew


only option

mistletoe

fakin' the funk

stuffwhitepeoplelike

throwback

i've been working on lyrics for the hardcore band that will never exist

this is all just snippets, phrases here and there, some good, some bad, all weird:

"our bassist just snowballed your acapella group's flautist"

"i poked a hole in it so she wouldn't forget me"

"in the future robots will freebase people"

"your vagina is like a pothole"

"...zeppelin is not hip hop.
steve seagal is not metal.
but danny glover is.
i wrote my dissertation on smoking pot and now i'm smoking pot."

"the deck ate my killer tape.
bloody hip shaped like oregon.
i swear to doc ellis that i was king of ohio once,
and eric's breath smells like catfood."

"if the bag's almost done, throw in more tobacco,
then huff computer duster
til andrew wakes up."


and a real live quote from allan yu:
"i have a 20-minute cumpilation with footage of me cumming on your face."

(click to download)

daniel johnston - respect (1985)

Rob Drew "Live" Set One from Joel Messer on Vimeo.

satanincarnateologist

mixologistkid88 (11:23:39 PM): working on this head wound sculpture

six hundred three score and six

(click)

liner notes of misfits "walk among us" cassette.

the gentlemen of CAMDEN have a gig at the middle east upstairs this sunday, the 13th. they'll be playing with a full band this time. i'll be there under the influence of fun and ginger beer.

dave and i burned and went skating in the rotten apple over thanksgiving time. we brought abada's flipcam and skated kind-of spots until it was time to twomp again.



other media:

happy bday dini


i dunno


iksrfo


set it and fucking forget it


debbie lamps on a lovely afternoon in downtown newark


good looks, stadtlander


nueva inglaterra


foreign kids


bobby steel


tamer dee will never return to jamaica plain

if you miss this, you celebrate kwanzaa

everyone listed is from new jersey. i repeat: everyone listed is from new jersey. good looks brian correia for the last min flyer. repost repost see you there ninjas.

penicillin

not kidding.

youtube channel with 300 HD hip hop vids from 87-93, like this one!

and this one:

and this one:


mad jammiez.

there's a man on yelp who has had me dying laughing for the past hour. i just read 100 yelp reviews and they're all killer. he reviewed shit that i didn't even care about, like canoe rental places and shit in towns of which i've never even heard. it was this review of video underground in jp that caught me initially:



"Yeah yeah I know, Netflix, but how bad does it suck when Netflix sends you The Shield season 3 disc 4 but they forget to send you season 3 disc 3? Dude, you know how when The Wire ended it made you feel almost as sad as that time in 10th grade when you dated a girl who was hopelessly out of your league so of course you fell madly in love with her and then two weeks later she dumped you because she figured out that she's out of your league and you got so depressed you couldn't even masturbate for a week? Homicide is the homely chick you rebounded on. Fuck Homicide and its pretentious editing. The Shield, man, The Shield will get you over that girl. And Video Underground has The Shield.

Dan P. is a pussy. I checked out their porno section because I am committed to you, my faithful readers. I don't even watch porn because I quit smoking pot, but I can tell you that the selection isn't really that great - they don't have Big Black Ass Next Door Vol. 4, which would be more of a problem if Melissa A. hadn't found it in my neighbor's yard last year during a party - but they do have a few Chicks With Dicks movies, and no one else on Yelp has told you that.

Here's what they do have: a documentary called "Gap-Toothed Women," which is literally a documentary about gap-toothed women. Here's what they don't have: Private Life of Plants, which is a documentary about plants and if you want to watch it you're pretty much gonna have to come over to my house, where I will try to get you to watch Big Black Ass Next Door Vol. 4 instead. That porno's not that great.

(Update: so two weeks later my friend Scott writes me on Facebook all "Dude I rented that documentary about gap-toothed women as a birthday present to myself and it was great! Thanks for the recommendation!")"


read every single word that Alex R. has to say. i really hope he doesn't review me. i'll be so bummed because he'll be right and i won't even have some witty comeback to post on this piece of shit blog.


other news, this
is what my throat looks like right now, but my mouth still looks dashing and ethnic, while the mouth pictured looks like macaulay caulkin in home alone/mj's bedroom. (again with the caulkin jokes?)

fuck strep throat.

i hate that i have to do this, but this is pretty good, jimmy fallon. shit. i'm not as good at reasonless grudges as i used to be.

my roommate had a boyfriend once.  i mean, she has a boyfriend now.  he's a nice guy. but she used to have a different one.  he wasn't that sweet. this guy has a mom.  i mean, they both have moms.  i've met the current boyfriend's mom.  she's down to earth.  pretty lady.  you know.  i don't mean it in that way.  i mean, you know, she looks nice, she's good looking.  she's not bad looking.  i say this as a basis for comparison.  look at my roommate's old boyfriend's mom: