i've been working on lyrics for the hardcore band that will never exist

this is all just snippets, phrases here and there, some good, some bad, all weird:

"our bassist just snowballed your acapella group's flautist"

"i poked a hole in it so she wouldn't forget me"

"in the future robots will freebase people"

"your vagina is like a pothole"

"...zeppelin is not hip hop.
steve seagal is not metal.
but danny glover is.
i wrote my dissertation on smoking pot and now i'm smoking pot."

"the deck ate my killer tape.
bloody hip shaped like oregon.
i swear to doc ellis that i was king of ohio once,
and eric's breath smells like catfood."

"if the bag's almost done, throw in more tobacco,
then huff computer duster
til andrew wakes up."


and a real live quote from allan yu:
"i have a 20-minute cumpilation with footage of me cumming on your face."